Slow Down Sister

Allegheny College. You taught me so many things. How to turn a sentence into a two-page paper. How its not a good thing to mix my alcohol all night long and expect to feel alive the next morning.  How to walk up hill in 3 feet of unshoveled snow in Arctic like temperatures. 

College also taught me how you start to "date." Everything is a race. A Nascar race. High speed, going around in circles dating all sorts of different guys, never really ever seeming to pass the black and white checkered flag.

Audge & I were talking about this at lunch the other afternoon. There we were eating some fries as we divulged how it now appears that we need to learn how to go slow when we meet someone new. Now, we aren't talking about how soon do you, or don't you, sleep with your new beau. No we are talking about going slow in the walk [we aren't sprinting anymore] to becoming boyfriend/girlfriend.

Back in our college days the label came quick.  By 3 weeks of hanging out, eating meals, studying in the library, and walking to class together it became Facebook official. Even some of the guys we have dated after college didn't take much more than 3 before it became official.

But here we both were- past the 3 week mark with both our beaux and nothing felt official. In fact, we had both been told by our beaux that they wanted to go slow for the outstanding circumstances of our crazy lives.  Understandable. Logic told us that it was the smart thing.  But-- why doesn't he wanna be my boyfriend?! Yes, that's right Ms. Emo came out.  We probably should have been drinking milkshakes instead of beers during this lunch.  At the very least Cosmos, those are at least girly.

So here we are. 24 and 23 years old, learning how to walk. Learning how to go slow. Learning how our motto should be "just let it happen."

You'd think being this old, we'd have the sense to walk. That going slow would be all that we wanted to do. I mean, we've both had our hearts broken more than once. Shouldn't we want to go slow? Why were we so willing to drive like Mario Andretti with our hearts? Why didn't we want to go slow?

I chalk it up to both Audge and I having a very similar I-want-it-gotta-have-it kind of attitude.  This attitudeis coupled with the fact that we have seen what is out there. When we find something we like, we don't want another girl coming in and stealing what we think we found first [ok, not first, but he was on the shelf and we picked him off it first, this time]. No, we want that title, because to us, that title is a mark of territory, rather than the description of how committed to one another we were as a couple to these beaux.

But really, when you think about it, that's what maybe these beaux are trying to get at. They want to go slow because they want the title of boyfriend/girlfriend to mean something about the depth of their feelings and commitment.  Right now they aren't there yet. How can you blame them, its only been a few weeks?

So here Audge and I go, learning how to slow it down.